I just got an evite for my department’s holiday party. I thought evites were hilarious when I first heard of them and I still think they’re hilarious even though everybody uses them now. I don’t know why I find them funny, but then again I think donkey punches are funny. Anyway here are fun antics I like to pull with evites:
1. I respond that I am going, but include that I will show up with 99 guests.
2. I respond with no and write that “I hate all you mother effers die die die” and then show up to the party anyway.
3. On the evites where people allow you to invite other people, I invite a bunch of imaginary celebrities. Like mohammed.ali@gmail.com, george.clinton@yahoo.com, etc.
Steve-o and I once threw a Chanukah party and used evite to organize it. One evitee responded that they couldn’t go, but in the comment advertised their own party on our evite. The response was like, “Hey sorry I can’t go, but I’m throwing a party here on this date at this time if anyone wants to go.” So someone should write a script that goes around to evites, responds no, but includes “hey if anyone wants some viagra, penis enlargement, or car loans click here.” Here is a reference chart, taken from this site, of how much certain adwords are worth:
school loan consolidation - $69.16
college loan consolidation - $68.35
car insurance quotes - $66.88
school consolidation - $66.29
auto insurance quotes - $65.90
college consolidation - $64.04
student loan consolidation rates - $60.14
sell structured settlement - $59.82
sell annuity - $58.92
federal student loan consolidation - $58.58
you know i thought i commented before… odd.
this evite thing reminds me of bill 49
“Sorry, me and my 49 guests can’t make it.”
and then he showed up anyway.